Dating choices are slim penpal and dating


10-Aug-2017 08:36

For example, having come of age around the same time as Brooks, he and I presumably had access to the same panoply of 1970s and 1980s mate-finding tools: bars, beaches, work, school and introductions through family and friends. The proof of this is the tremendous number of marriages originating online.On that statistically “slim pickings” number of opportunities — akin to what the surviving members of an endangered species have — we based our most important decision: selecting a mate. In 20 years or so, when we can study the durability of these relationships, maybe we’ll find out that these marriages, compared with those of the less recent past, happen to be more enduring.So why are people still embarrassed to say they met on the Internet?And why is Internet dating more likely to be the brunt of a comic one-liner (“It’s like the high school cafeteria; nothing looks good, but you have to pick something”), then praised for its demonstrably life-improving effects?By almost any measure, Internet dating is ubiquitous. Per an op-ed piece in The New York Times, over one-third of couples who married in the last few years met online.And then there’s the anecdotal evidence: just about everyone knows a couple who met on or its equivalent.

dating choices are slim-65

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First and foremost, online dating is chastised as being a “meat market.” As New York Times columnist David Brooks recently lamented, online daters are “shopping for human beings, commodifying people.” This criticism ignores the huge benefit of “commodified” dating: expanding the world of dating experience, and, hopefully, the knowledge about oneself and others that can flow from it. Despite the critics, online daters are analyzing people across the same spectrum as anyone ever did, just with more choices.Put in perspective, we each probably spent more time apartment hunting than having experiences that helped select our now-divorced spouses. If so, the pundits probably will cite “commoditizing,” and all the good flowing from the concomitant expansion of experience, learning and choice, as why.



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